What should you do when your husband is financially irresponsible?
When my husband and I were dating he had financial trouble but he told me it was his debt ex-wife’s irresponsible spending that drove him deep into. After we married I discovered he does his fair share of irresponsible spending too. He works 60-80 hours a week at a job for reasonable pay but the money is spent as soon as it hits the bank account. He has even started working a 2nd job but he has a lame story about how he has to wait six months to be paid. I think he’s spending the money and not telling me. He’s now taking out loans we can not afford to pay. He buys TVs and video game equipment and cars and guns that we can not afford. He is always working or out goofing off with his friends and he does not spend any time with the family. When he is home he is rude to me and he rarely plays with the kids. I have tried to take a more active role in the finances but even when we work out a budget he does not stick to it. I am a stay-at-home mom with my own fair share of debt from a previous marriage so I can not open a bank account in my name and I am financially dependent on him. I have tried to find a job on my own to pay the bills but I can not find a job that will pay for child care for our 2 young kids and he is never home to watch them. I do not want to get a divorce because I still love him and I hope that someday he will be willing to go to marriage counseling and improve on these issues but I do not want him to drag me further into debt with him. I live in Texas legal separation so there is no. Is there any other way to protect myself financially without going so far as to get a divorce?
i don’t know sweetheart but i hope he changes for you and the kids. odds are he may not. my sympathies to you.
This issue is about more than money. You are having trust issues among many other issues. A marriage counselor is a good start here. If he won’t go, then you go alone.
Your children’s school counselor can give you referrals for family/relationship counselors.
It will change your life.
Probably not. In fact you could wind up with all the bills already existing anyway if he should skip.
You need to talk to a lawyer, and probably you should do it soon.
Talk to a lawyer,you may have to go to court and have him declared legally financially incompetent.
He can still work and earn a paycheck,he just can’t spend it except what you give him as a spending allowance.
Or set up 2 checking accounts,money goes into 1 account for you to pay bills,food etc.
the other is his for paying his bills and his spending.
I know how you feel, my first husband was very irresponsible with money too, but luckily I was working and kept a separate bank account, it was one of the major things that led to our divorce. The only way out of this is to somehow become financially independent, maybe your family/friends can look after your kids while you work? It’s going to be tough but it’s probably the best way to ensure you have enough money to make ends meet. See if you can take a certain amount of money off him each week and put it away for savings.